“Hate is healthy,” says scientist Julianne Holt-Lunstad from the University of Utah in Salt-Lake-City. Well, if we can trust her research, it’s better than ambivalent emotions because they cause a higher rise in blood pressure. With us, you don’t have to hold back your hate. We don’t want you to become sick! So these are 10 things developers hate. Enjoy!
1) Programming
Some things you need to love to hate them. This type of hate we’re talking about is especially familiar to developers. Programming is like having a partner, that spices up your life. But she/he can also make it hell on earth, and you don’t understand what you did wrong. You think you’re a perfect partner, but then, out of nothing, she/he deletes all the Facebook photos with you on it and blocks you on Instagram. And on the contrary, she/he bakes you your favorite cake (Black Forest cake of course) after you forgot the birthday of her/his mother. Confused? We are too. What we are trying to say is: Sometimes the code doesn’t make any sense. Everything seems to be correct - Error. You don’t know what the hell you’re doing - Success! “Irony in the life of a Dev” - out now.
2) Interruptions
Emails, calls, meetings, a drone with a secret message floating past your office window: Man, there are so many beautiful ways to get interrupted. Especially in the century of Digital Revolution. Sure, Slack can help, but can also bring its problems with it. Maybe you just want to be a good co-worker and feel pressured to respond right away, or you just can’t weigh in with your opinion. But one thing is for sure: Once someone interrupts you in your “flow state,” it is harsh and very, very annoying to get back in.
Image Credit: Geeks Humor
3) Marketing
Annoyingly for the developer, there are situations in which marketing is promising the client “heaven on earth.” For example, to win him over or because they just don’t know, that a product can’t have extensive features. Sorry to all marketing specialists out there. We know there are real diamonds amongst you too, but most of you have never built a product!
4) Revisit your old code
“Who was the idiot that wrote this horrible code?! - Oh yes, that was me.” To revisit your code after some time is almost as terrifying, as having to work with the one of another idiot. The solution:
"Always code as if the guy who ends up maintaining your code will be a violent psychopath who knows where you live. Code for readability."—John F. Woods (Even if you’re the psychopath.)
Image Credit: Reddit
5) Semicolons
You’ve just written 1000 lines of code, you press the magic button and lo and behold - 1000 errors. That can only be the fault of a missing semicolon. A semicolon seems so trivial to humanity but doesn’t let you sleep for days.
6) Changes of thought
“I like it, but I have a few more ideas, that we should realize.” No, just no. “It’s great you’ve gotten some inspiration on your yoga-retreat, but that means, I can redesign the whole project,” you might think to yourself. The client is king, and luckily we’re not in the age of “Waterfall” anymore. But to be completely honest: having to make new add-ons with short notice really is no fun.
7) Stereotype: Computer-Doctor
Grandma, Grandpa, Uncle, Aunt and the old Lady in the next village your dog ran to in elementary school. Everyone asks you for help as soon as there are problems with their computers. We feel your pain. Maybe this shirt can help.
Image credit: funny-tee-shirts.com
8) Stack overflow error
Okay, nothing much to say here. Just take a week off. You’re excused!
9) Internet Explorer
To be fair, the only thing Internet Explorer is good for is to install Google Chrome or Firefox. It is the tram amongst the Web Browser. You’ll agree with us when we say: “Ain’t nobody got time for that!”
Image credit: knowyourmeme
10) Recruiter
Recruiting can be a win-win-win for all parties. The company gets a new employee, you get a sick job, and the recruiter gets a few coins and the satisfaction of having helped someone with their professional growth. That is, should hy recruit you. We know though, most recruiters don’t give a damn about you. They don’t care what your skills are and what you want. It’s like mass processing. But hey, should you ever come across a great recruiter (like our Ela) support them. Even if you’re not looking for a job atm. Recommend him to a friend or keep him/her in mind for when you are seeking, or tell him/her to reach out to you once a job becomes available that you might want to hear about. “You never know what you were missing till you try,” like the good old Emile Ford once sang.
And because Devs have even more love hidden somewhere behind all that hate, we are preparing the next article for you. “10 things developers love”. Stay tuned!
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